(no subject)

[captain_fucking_magic]

It's been a weird few days for Harry. But weird in a good way, which is sort of what makes it weird. He's not really used to so many good things happening at once like that. He and Harmony are going out on Saturday (which, ok, that's going to be awkward since he's down to like, his last $40), he's got a job that doesn't involve moving heavy boxes across some nasty warehouse, and no-one's tried to shoot at him in several weeks.

He's celebrating by taking over Perry's sofa with a book he found in the office. He's half-way through The Sign of Four and wondering why no-one ever told him that the Victorians were into more than just melodramatic romance. He might have actually read these earlier if someone had bothered to tell him that there was actually a decent plot to them.

Comments

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

Perry slops coffee over his hand.

"Fuck, ow. What do you mean, sex?" He sticks his hand in his mouth.

[captain_fucking_magic]

OK, Harry is not as stupid as some people might like to believe. As evidenced by the look he's giving Perry right now. You know, the sort that says that he knows he's not being told something.

"You know, sex. Where two people who don't necessarily love one another get naked and go to bed together." He shrugs slightly. "If I met Batwoman, I'd have tried to sleep with her. But you know, you're gay. You're probably holding out for Batman."

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"No, I was always more interested in Robin. Batman was always a bit butch for my tastes," Perry deadpans. "And she wouldn't have been interested. Batwoman probably likes more class."

He thinks he'd die if Harry managed to meet that poor girl and hit on her. Twice if it actually worked.

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Oh, you would be. Little boys in tights do it or you then, Per?"

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

Perry reaches across and hits him on the ear.

"Don't be a bitch, or I'll do it again. What happened to your English chick, anyway?"

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Ow! She has this really scary ex-boyfriend and this guy who sleeps on her couch," Harry says, rubbing his ear. "And besides, I think Harmony and me might be getting back together, or whatever it is. We're going out on Saturday."

He ignores how awkward that's gonna be, if she wins up paying for everything.

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Oh really," Perry keeps his face neutral. Harmony's nuts, he thinks maybe he should try competing with the guy on the couch, but whatever. "Where you gonna take her?"

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Uh... I don't know, actually," Harry says, as though this is a brand new realisation. "I don't really know the area, and she does, so I figure I'll let her pick the place, you know?"

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Oh yes, anything as long as it's not over forty bucks? I hear there's a great Denny's near Sunset Boulevard, you could try there," Perry sneers.

[captain_fucking_magic]

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"I thought so. Augh, look, I know a place on the Sunset Strip, it's nice, quiet, all that bullshit. Hell, even I've been on a date there," he takes in Harry's appearance. "You can't go in that."

[captain_fucking_magic]

Harry looks down at his sweat pants. "Yeah, I figured I'd have to put on some jeans or something. You know, unless we're going to a slumber party."

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Not those ones you stole off a bum. Do you have any jeans that don't have holes in them?"

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Yeah," Harry insists. "Of course I do."

They just don't fit him very well. He probably stole them off of one of the guys he used to live with.

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Do you mean those ones that look like elephant skin? Because you're not allowed to wear those either. I might have to go back there some day," Perry looks annoyed. "Why are you so scrawny?"

[captain_fucking_magic]

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?" Harry asks. "I--I'm not scrawny. Fuck off. I'm just... small. Ish. Small-ish. Shut up."

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Whatever you say, Chief," Perry looks annoyed. He feels like he's not only let the stray in to keep warm, but also that he's now buying it a collar 'just in case'. "Drink up, you're not going to get any girls looking like you lost a fight with the Goodwill bin."

[captain_fucking_magic]

If Perry were anyone else, Harry would dump his coffee out onto the floor. But he's Perry, and Harry both appreciates too much all that Perry's done for him and is frankly too scared of the guy to try anything quite so bold.

"I don't want any girls. I just want Harmony," he says after taking a small drink.

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

Oh my god. This person. Will be the death of him. Those fuckin' eyes man.

"Yeah, well, she won't be caught dead in any restaurant with you looking like that," Perry folds his arms, obstinately. He's already mentally flipping through the available choices and coming up with the inevitable decision that he will be spending some of today at the department store in town.

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Yeah, well, fine. I'll find something. We're not going out until Saturday."

OK, he doesn't actually have a plan. Who cares? He'll work something out.

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Look, I'll cut you a deal, because I'm a fucking angel," Perry leans forward. "Book the restaurant, clean your damn room, and we'll go down to Macy's. Don't fucking argue with me, if you screw it up with Harmony I get to spend the next six months listening to you bitch like a little girl."

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Room's mostly done," Harry says, maybe missing the point. "Just a couple of boxes and stuff. I can take those out to the trash later."

He takes another drink of his coffee before his mind catches hold of something else Perry said.

"Wait, what's at Macy's?"

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Clothes that were actually made after the year 2000? Hey, maybe we'll go mad and even get you some without holes," Perry gives Harry's sweats a sneer. "And maybe some that you know, actually fit you."

Even though he'll be kind of sorry to see the back of those sweats. Fuck off, you would be too.

"Don't think I'm doing this to get you laid. You work for me now. If anyone sees you looking like that, they'll think you're my abused house-boy."

[captain_fucking_magic]

Harry's going to connect that dot with another.

Just wait for it...

"So... Is this all gonna come out of my pay cheque, too?"

Well, we didn't say which dots he was going to connect.

[thereal-lapi.livejournal.com]

"Yes," No. "Don't worry though, there's a sale. And no, you don't have a choice in the matter, I'm fed up with you looking like the Salvation Army threw up on you."

And if you think Perry's never had to man-handle a guy into a car and around a store before, you would be so very wrong.