Round Two

[captain_fucking_magic]

Harry's still rather new to this whole Milliways business, and it takes him a good while to accept the fact that he went through the front door from Perry's house, and has now gone back through that same door to find himself in a completely different house.

He's going to ignore the whole other country business all together. For now.

"That's, uhm... What the fuck?"

OK, he wasn't sure what was going to happen, but this was not it.

Comments

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"Oh."

Way to make it awkward. At least she knows he's not going to murder her. She slows down a bit as they draw near her place, swinging the shopping bag thoughtfully.

"Yes, but you didn't steal anything. And it's not like it'd be hard in there or anything. So, that's a good thing, right?"

She gives his hand a hopefully reassuring squeeze and hands him the bag to fumble for her key.

[captain_fucking_magic]

Hey, she asked.

"Yeah, I'm... I'm working on it. I don't even know why I do it. I just, you know, feel like I have to for some reason. Is that fucked up? I think it might be fucked up."

He shrugs as though this is a perfectly normal thing to be discussing.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"It's probably a little messed up. But that's okay. Some of my favourite people are a little messed up. It's why I like them."

She pauses on the step to look him squarely in the eye (which the narration only comments on because that doesn't happen much to Mary step).

"What is it with the people I know not thinking they're any good?" With this cryptic comment, she kisses him on the cheek, (because he does tend to stand there like an idiot) gets the door open and leaves him to make his own way up the stairs.

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Huh?"

Well, he didn't expect any of that, so it takes him a few moments to catch up mentally before following after her.

"Wait, what did you mean by that? I don't--I mean..."

OK, he just doesn't know, apparently.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"Bless." He's so cute when he's confused. It's like being friends with one of the animals out of Bambi or something. Maybe Flower? Having made up her mind to call Harry that at the very next opportunity, Mary offers him an open packet of sweets.

"Food should be here in ten or so. Want one? They're jelly babies."

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Jelly...babies?" He blinks at that one. "OK, that is fucked up, and I don't even know what it is."

He's not sure that he wants to. He still peers at the packet curiously, though.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"They don't bite back you know. Eat the head first, that's my advice."

Mary takes a red one out of the bag and puts it in his mouth.

"Chew."

The door-bell rings, and she hands him the packet and runs downstairs.

[captain_fucking_magic]

Oh. Huh. It's just a really demented gummy bear, then. Not quite the same, but close enough. He takes a few more.

"Oh, is that the guy?" he asks around a mouth full of Jelly Babies.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

There's a muffled exclamation from Mary downstairs, and one might make out someone giggling and Mary sounding cross.

"...I hate you, I hate him, I don't care if you paid I'm going to stick that cane where not even Sherlock will find it..." She's definitely cussing someone out as she comes back up the stairs.

[captain_fucking_magic]

Harry's still going to town on those Jelly Babies.

"Everything all right down there, honey?" Harry calls down. "I can... help? Can I help?

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"...You know if you'd text I would have sent you a picture. This is worse than that time with the drag-queen called Morris--" Mary cuts herself off as she comes back in and attempts a smile.

"Harry, this is John. He's paid for dinner but don't feel the need to thank him. I'm going to kill him later anyway."

She waves a hand behind her.

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Oh. Uhm. Hi," Harry says. "Sorry, I didn't know that paying for dinner was a hanging offence. I'll be sure to let you pay from here on out."

You may want to take those Jelly Babies away from him. Really, he's like a child.

John, to his credit, is doing an amazing job at not laughing like a loon.

"Wow," he says. "Sherlock was right. He... yeah."

Harry blinks. "I what?"

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

Mary, who is blushing furiously, treats John to a vicious poke in the side.

"You're so horrible." Then to Harry. "He's here because Sherlock told him I'd brought home a lookalike. I'll be killing him later too, even if I have to get a chair."

She snatches the take-away stuff off John and starts putting it out on the coffee-table.

"Will someone go and poke about till they find plates? And by someone I mean John."

She tries to communicate to Harry how sorry she is that this is happening, but she's mainly doing it by staring at him meaningfully.

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Fine, kick me out," John says. He goes into the kitchen, leaving the other two behind. "Not like I can't hear you guys from all the way over here in the kitchen, though."

Harry nods slowly. "Right. Yeah. That what's his name guy. What's his name?" He reaches out to pick at the take away curry and what have you.

"Robert Downey Jr," John calls out from the kitchen, taking his sweet time at grabbing plates.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"Oh gosh." Mary resists the urge to squirm. "There's a passing resemblance, at best. He's too short!"

She sits next to Harry and decides to ignore John, in the same way the cat does.

"Sorry about him. He was in the Army and now he has no manners. That's chicken tikka masala. Um. There should be some pilau rice somewhere. And poppadoms." She starts rooting through the bags in earnest.

[captain_fucking_magic]

John comes back out with enough tablewear for three. What? He paid. He can eat if he wants.

"No, he wears ridiculous shoes when he plays Holmes and Tony Stark. Watch the second one when he hangs up the painting in his mancave."

"Hey!" Harry interjects. "I'm not short. No shorter than him over there."

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"John. Shut up. I can't believe I ever let you make me toast."

Way to go on ignoring him there Mary.

"Harry. Here, eat this." She dips some poppadom into the sauce of the chicken and hands it to him. "Harry's never had curry before."

Maybe if she just pretends that she doesn't want to toss him out of the window it'll become true?

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Careful, or I might make him toast next," says John. "Do you want to feed it do him or should I?"

Harry was enjoying the poppadom thing, up until John said that. Now he's sort of choking.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

Mary can't help herself at that and starts giggling.

"You're still horrible. I'll tell Sherlock on you." She rubs Harry's back sympathetically. "Ignore the big mean man. I won't let him feed you toast."

She piles Harry's plate with a bit of everything. "Stuff furthest away from you is the hottest. It's called vindaloo. Traditionally it should be eaten whilst drunk, but it'll have gone cold by then."

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Oh. Uhm. OK." Harry looks a bit lost. At everything.

John's already tucked into his own plate and shakes his head slightly. "Bit thick, this one," he says in a way that almost makes it sound like he's talking about the chicken somehow.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"I thought it was okay." Mary could also be talking about the chicken. "It's kind of sweet, actually."

She nudges Harry. "It's good when it's hot. Try the chicken first." Taking pity, she sits closer, leaning on him. "You've got the chicken tikka, lamb rogan josh, and beef vindaloo. The rice isn't anything special, they just dye some of the grains to make it look pretty. I've got yoghurt if it's a bit hot, alright?"

[captain_fucking_magic]

"Yoghurt with rice?" asks Harry. "How do you people come up with this stuff?"

John snorts. "At least he's cute."

"What?" Harry looks up at John and moves away ever so slightly.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"It's good though. And you are cute. John's just jealous."

Mary stays close as she begins her own meal, hoping that she can keep Harry from just bolting and never returning by pure physical contact. She points a fork at John.

"John, you be nice, poor flower's never had curry before, and he's new in the country."

(She also mentally awards herself points for getting 'flower' into conversation.)

[captain_fucking_magic]

"No. Harry. Who the hell is Flower?" he asks. This conversation is not getting any easier.

"Hey, about that," says John as he looks up. "Where did you two meet?"

Harry has no idea how to answer that, so he just pays attention to his plate.

[mscontrarymary.livejournal.com]

"At a bar. You know, the old fashioned way. None of this weeks of internet angst, like some people. We hit it off."

Mary's met people without certain papers before, you see.

"We were just going to chill with a movie, but now I'm just waiting for Bill and Mike to pop out of the..."

She suddenly looks horrorstruck.


"Oh no. John. You didn't invite Mike did you? Or Bill?"